Awww. Give the weenie a hankie when you get back
“Not a team player”, gripes and mumbles the boss as he drives towards the Wells Fargo Center that weeknight, he and the other executives have a luxury suite to watch the 76ers and Flyers, season tickets!
I get 5 sick days a year. I can roll over sick days, allowing up to 13 sick days a year. If I use more that 2 in a row, I need a doctors note. If I use 5 sick days in a row I forfeit my bonus pay for that month. Fuck me right?
Sounds like your country has really shitty workers rights.
Yeah thats why foreign companies have their manufacturing here where they can underpay and abuse stupid americans.
You should know better than to get sick!
Easy, take 4.95 sick days and go pick up something from the office on Friday afternoon
Meanwhile I fear stress with my boss after coming back from vacation. Because I have not planned enough vacation days this year yet.
My current boss is by far the best one I’ve ever had.
It’s me.
I’ve also got a great employee. That’s me as well.
I also choose this guy’s boss
Any good office pranks?
I wouldn’t know. My office moves on 4 wheels and is full of tools. She’s the one pulling the pranks on me and they’re never good - just expensive.
FunkFPV, is that you?
Kidding. Sounds like you’re still mostly winning though, good on ya.
Same. Technically I report to someone at the company I contract with but mostly that’s just to let them know when I’ll be in and when I won’t.
Are these people related? I smell nepotism
I’ve heard from friends who are self employed that this is a double edged sword. When you have an employer and take vacation, it feels like you’ve earned it and are taking time off at the expense of your employer. But when you’re self employed it feels like you’re just not getting paid.
One of my friends didn’t take any time off for something like 5 years before realizing how incredibly bad that was for him.
Yeah but the sexual harassment never stops!
Goes to HR:
“My boss grabbed my dick and shook the piss out of it in the bathroom! Then he made me go into a stall and wiped my ass to check if that risky fart he had noticed earlier was indeed just a fart!”
“No shit?”
“None!”
Then he sits down and makes himself an award certificate for best personal hygiene and another for most caring boss and wonders if talking to himself really means he’s crazy.
HR: “You know what? Promotion!”
“For me or the boss?”
HR: “For the boss of course”
I’m currently at my best job, and it’s because I have a union who can tell the boss to fuck himself for me.
I have some weird memories being 12 and wanting to be American haha.
I would never
Let be honest, Hollywood is a hell of a good propaganda, I mean, it’s where the shit happens
Yeah I bet it was because of movies / TV shows
TBF, there are a lot of upsides to living in the US. It’s the “fine print” that usually fucks people though :p
I pretty much order my staff to take time off.
your boss does not give them you, it is your right (possibly only at a minimal level too)
In civilised countries yes. In the US that minimum (federally at least) is 0.
🍁?
Interesting. At my place HR explicitly encourages using up all of our paid vacation days every year
Are you allowed to carry over PTO hours? I might just be a pessimist, but my immediate thought is if they ever have to let anybody go, they don’t want to pay-out accrued PTO hours.
At my previous place, there was one employee that NEVER took PTO for some insane reason. Had saved up like 2 months of PTO.
He was told by HR he had too many hours and needed to use some PTO time. This specific scenario is not unheard of.
However, a month or so after he came back from a month and a half of PTO, he got laid off for reasons unknown to me.
Rumors are they didn’t want to pay-out the PTO.
Honestly it doesn’t make sense, they had to pay him for the PTO anyways, but when has HR made sense?
Oh that’s definitely because they don’t want to pay it out at the end of the financial year. But at least it kind of sometimes ends up working in the employee’s favor
It’s at their convenience though. Want Christmas week off? Too bad. What Labor Day week off? Too bad.
HR wants the liability gone, your boss wants your ass in the seat 24/7. Neither are looking out for you.
Or, your boss is more checked out than you and legitimately, gives no shits
I am fortunate enough to have a manager that only gives a shit about deadlines being met. I’m 100% WFH and can work at whichever hours I choose. Though I feel I must mention I neither live nor work in the US
That’s really good. My boss looks out for me too.
At my work if I don’t book at least 75% of my holiday days by like a month after renewal my boss starts to really moan at me.
The meme must be an American thing.
You in Germany. There is some kind of tax thing, so it costs money if people don’t take there holidays in the year itself, so companies are mostly quite keen with you raking all holidays.
Lmao what an American comment. Bro it’s not just in Germany, it’s more like it’s only in the US
I was adressing the “aggresively urging to take your holidays on time”, which is a very German thing and it is so due to local laws. Never heard that about any other country. I am also not American, but turkish (living in Germany).
UK. But it’s actually a German company. Everywhere I’ve worked has been pushy about you using your holiday though (managers obviously don’t want it to hit the end of the year and suddenly everyone wants to use it instead of loosing it) but the 75% almost as soon as it renews is the most extreme example I’ve come across.
Government job I had gave 10 sick days a year. Use or lose. I’d do extended weekends. Boss said he’d noticed a pattern of me calling in sick on Fridays. Well duh. Started alternating Mondays. He gave up.
In a perfect societ, we would have paid and unpaid leave instead of sick leave
In the US, a lot of companies have started doing this.
I just got PTO, no separate vacation or sick leave.
Had one that let you accumulate one sick day per month, but if you didn’t use them they rolled over. First few years I didn’t use all of them, and then one year I used thirteen sick days in one year (most of them for kids home sick from school) and got lightly scolded for it in a performance review.
I wanted to say “Bitch why do you allow rollover at all if you don’t want us using more than we can possibly accumulate in one year?!” Looked it up in the contract and it said nothing at all about maximum sick days usable in a year. Of course if you have sick days left when you leave, they pay out at one third, but FUCK that, I earned that time, I’m not taking a one third payout. And they didn’t EVER give merit raises for those years I barely called out sick.
So the next year I took even MORE sick days, and afterwards made sure not to leave any unused, even if I wasn’t sick, because fuck them.
Oh geez this thread is full of cynical amuricans
Hard not to be cynical when we’re treated like shit because our parents, grandparents, and dipshit neighbors keep enabling the billionaire oligarchs in stealing our money and our time. Yeah I’m fucking cynical, mate.
Your boss did not give you vacation days. Your government/union did.
That’s not strictly true. In the US there is in most states NO requirements for paid leave outside of a few protected types. But not vacation or sick. And we also are largely not unionized. We still have time off albeit MUCH less than Europeans and such.
Though I’d argue the norm of having any paid time off is a byproduct of labor/union battles in the past.
We’re given just enough scraps to avoid mass unionization. That’s because the last time it happened we got The New Deal. This time it’ll be the Economic Bill of Rights. The leftist platform hasn’t changed for 80 years.
Would be nice if there were more voices calling for democracy in the workplace. That would change so many things and make concentration of wealth and political corruption much more difficult.
Where did they say they were from the US?
Nowhere, but they said it as though it was a universal truth and I provided an example to the contrary.
Guys, he’s from the US.
It’s implied from the combination of English and the boss being mad about the worker taking their vacation days tbh
I dunno. I work a 35 hr week with 6 weeks paid vacation and 20 days paid personal leave each year… Oh, yeah, and it accumulates annually if I don’t use any of it.
Oh, and 17%>of my income is paid into retirement in addition to my salary, not out of my salary.
It’s a bit above the legal minimum, but it’s still pretty normal here.
How the fuck is sick leave not protected. Y’all Americans need to be rioting over that shit. That’s wild
I’d say you earned them as part of the agreed compensation in exchange for your work. That way you also cover circumstances where there’s no union, and no government requirement, but the employer still offers PTO to be competitive with other employers. Which theoretically could also be driven by other people’s unions or governments, but then that would be indirect.
Besides which, regardless of how the arrangement came to be, you earned your PTO.
Bullshit, neither are true for most people in the US.
😂
I’ve got 9 weeks of vacation saved up, and I must take it you say?
Ok, I’ll see you in 9 weeks!
What do you mean, 9 week is too long to be gone? Make up your mind!
In my younger days I witnessed this conversation
Guy was basically Brent (if you know you know) for a huge project. So on the 2st of Dec our boss phoned him and said he had 4 weeks to take before jan 1st. Brent’s responce was cool see you next year and was told no I can’t let you do that
We just looked at eacother in total amused confusion
Was it me? Because I had that conversation back in '10 or '11. I ended up taking most of it off then took off the rest after the project “off the books” (but with an email paper trail because I’ve been burned before).
Maybe. Did you move to Germany a couple years later?
Sadly I did not. I have visited but I was only there a few weeks to have beer and bratwurst.
I’m starting to think that there are a lot of managers who demand the impossible.
Tell me you work in the US without telling me you work in the US.
Not calling you out specifically, but I see this phrase everywhere and don’t understand its popularity. It would be more concise and equally “clever” to just say “Sounds like this guy works in the US”. What is the appeal that everyone keeps typing this?
Tell me you don’t get memes without telling me you doing get memes…
Why did you type out “what is” when “what’s” is shorter and as clear?
and did you really need that “just” in there?
It’s a colloquialism of Internet denizens that I’ve seen floating around for many years. In fact it’s somewhat baffling to me that you haven’t seen it until now.
I was saying I see it everywhere?
Right, my bad. I guess I’m hinting at your comment needing a bit of a massage until it says what you mean. My suspicion is you actually just don’t like the turn of phrase, not that you don’t get why it’s used, right? Which is perfectly fine yo.
Hell, the way you phrased not liking something as "not getting it’ and yor statement just now with the “?” At the end of it are both standard interwebby colloquialisms.
Not fighting, just saying
Well like other people were saying, there’s a trend of people posting this prompt, and then others responding with funny answers. You’re right, I don’t like it when people use the same formulation in response to a comment. I also don’t get why people are doing it, for the same reason: I don’t think it’s funny, and it doesn’t really add anything to the conversation.
Usually memes are funny because there’s a familiar pattern and then people riff on the pattern and make little unexpected tweaks. The type of usage I don’t like and don’t get is when people are just saying “you’re this” in a more wordy way. It has the form of a joke with no punchline.
I get what you’re saying bout the repetitiveness of the way people communicate. Someone it can feel like a bunch of LLMs slapping together the same 10-15 lines together to mimic speech.
I attemt to say things in different ways and have a “voice” you can hear to fight this repetitiveness, and out of sheer boredom towards the ways things are commonly said. THAT said I’m “guilty” of using memespeech too, and if course it can be clever shorthand to convey feeling if used properly.
Dunno where I’m going with this but i do feel ya.
Personally I think this was a good use of the phrase. I was thinking it already when I read it. Good comment.
Because it’s high time Americans wake the fuck up from thier slumber and realize that the US is the equivalent of a homeless, toothless, smelly, dying junkie wearing a brand new Gucci belt.
The appeal is to be cheeky, dig it in, and popularize the notion of knocking the chip off of American shoulders, rattling their cages, and normalizing the world view amongst 1st world countries and educated immigrants that the US is actually a place to be avoided.
The United States is overwhelmingly a predatory nation against its own citizenry.
That’s my take.
Lol, well I didn’t mean specifically “tell me you’re from the US” just the general phrase “tell me X without telling me X”.
And can confirm that plenty of Americans aren’t thrilled with how things are run in America. We’re running democracy v0.1 beta
Someone said it on Twitter once so I suppose it’s stuck. I find it a bit long-winded and all.
People gotta go watch that scene from The Newsroom.
I’ll link it. It’s true.
https://youtu.be/wTjMqda19wk?si=p-IgIHmjlNOGr8ut
There are lots of places in the world where people have far better quality of life and don’t need to cower in fear of who’s going to try and kill them and their families next.
Or let simple medical issues become complicated medical issues because of fear of bankruptcy.
Yup. I had 2 medical procedures that would’ve set me back over $100,000 in the US. In Canada I was miffed that I had to pay for parking during the surgery.
AFAIK it’s been a challenge some people did on… twitter I think?
Basically it’s “Tell me you’re XYZ without telling me you’re XYZ” and people responded with funny answers.
At some point that got turned around and people satrted to use that sencence structure to indicate that the thing they are commenting on would have been a great answer for that challenge.Thanks yeah, I’ve seen that sort of thread. If anything in this particular case it would make more sense if the comment was “tell me what country you’re from without telling me what country you’re from.”
Memes gonna meme.
Not calling you out specifically, but I see this phrase everywhere and don’t understand its popularity. It would be more concise and equally “clever” to just say “Sounds like this guy works in the US”. What is the appeal that everyone keeps typing this?
Tell me you’re from the US without telling me you’re from the US.
It may be coming from those popular AskReddit threads, such as: Tell me what you do for a living without telling what you do for a living.
Regurgitating memes isn’t about being concise or clever lol