semi- Serious question, Idon’t get it. Most of us get why the hegemonic gender system is stupid, why subscribe to the binary role you were assigned? Also, why do straight people exist? Maybe it’s just me but I like to look and feel like my own perception of what is attractive.
To me gender means nothing but anatomy. Identifying as a different gender doesn’t even give you more social freedom to self express. Society perceives your anatomy and if your self expression clashes with your anatomy in a manner which makes homophobes think you’re gay, you’re in danger because of this, not gender.
Ideally only sex would be a thing and expression wouldn’t matter, but unfortunately gender sort of exists socially.
isnt that your sex? while gender is what you feel you should be?
The traditional answer is that yes that is what sex is, but gender is a social role that isn’t “what sex you wish you were” but relates to the various performed aspects of being male or female (etc.) Being really strict, there is “gender identity”, the gender you self-identify with, and “gender,” what society perceives you as (equivalent to if you pass or not).
I wanna answer sincerely, but I also wanna be silly like this post.
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I was always told I was a boy, and it just felt correct, never do I not see a male figure in the mirror nor feel feminine/girly, and I am for the most part “manly” in the way I go about my life. I’m quite fortunate that I don’t see the need to pontificate on the issue very much.
Maybe it’s just me but I like to look and feel like my own perception of what is attractive.
I don’t think that anyone’s preferences or identity is any less genuinely theirs just because they were influenced by culture. Moreover, what we find attractive can vary greatly from person to person, even within the binary norm.
Because being the agender I generally feel inside is effort I’d rather spend elsewhere I guess. Gender is performative. I’d rather not perform at all, but there’s no such thing as not performing, an unperformance. So I passively perform the identity put upon me, feeling powerless to step outside of my experience nor how society experiences me.
Heteronormativity doesn’t make sense to me. To my subrational mind, everyone possesses an ungendered essence, which is filtered through and expressed by social and physical constructs like gender and whatnot.
Merely signs or signifiers for the essence that is the person with whom a connection might be made.Rationally I don’t think these conceptions are particularly true, but they kind of describe how I subconsciously understand the world.
I’ve never had an issue with the gender I was assigned and have never felt compelled to think about it until I started to understand gender as a social construct. Even after that though, WRT my own identity, I’ve thought about it as much as I care to and concluded everytime that, no, I really do feel most comfortable as what I was told I was from birth. I’m bi, not hetero though.
That’s a stupid question imo
I didn’t choose my gender but there’s still a reason I’m non-binary. I learned the gender was bs and realized I never strongly associated with being a dude and didn’t want to grow up to be by others.
The reason why I’m cisgender is partly bc I can’t imagine myself as anything else in terms of gender
Path of least resistance i guess. I’m always trying to put in the least amount of effort possible on things that don’t matter that much to me, and my gender expression is just not something that i really care about anymore so i just go with what is easiest and takes the least amount of maintenance.
As for why straight people exist, i don’t know… do they? I used to think so but now I’m not so certain anymore. Nowadays i tend to think that everyone is more or less on a spectrum. Being completely straight seems as impossible to me as reaching absolute zero temperature. You can approach it but never really reach it.
So yeah, in conclusion i think straight people are probably a myth, and the only reason i’m cis is because every other option sounds like too much work.
Totally agree, everyone’s gotta be a tiny bit bi, that might explain people being ok cis. Even people who really think they’re straight are probably attracted to some enbies or femboys (who turn everyone gay).
I don’t agree with this one-drop rule for straightness. I have incidentally found men attractive, but at the end of the day, that’s the exception: I have found thousands of women attractive for every such incidence. It is disingenuous to call me as bisexual as a result—or at least renders the term meaningless.
Sure, but no one is strictly pure straight.
I don’t dispute that, but it doesn’t change its usefulness as a metric. I guess the question is where does ‘straightness’ end and ‘bisexuality’ begin? I’d argue that a Kinsey 1, for example, is still a straight guy. Labels are less like algebra and more like statistics—there’s always a bit of fuzz around the edges, or outliers you can safely ignore.
This is a misconception. Cis people don’t choose their gender, nor do heteros their sexuality. All babies are born genderfluid bisexual. When they start teething, gender and sexuality fairies arrive and make the baby into something else. Babies too fabulous for heterosexuality are made homosexual. If the sexuality fairy doesn’t visit a baby, but they just love everyone so much, they can’t distingush someone[s] they particularly like to limit their love to, they end up identifying as asexual.
I know the gender fairy visited me, we have pictures and everything, but I not sure about the sexuality fairy. I’m told they arrived, but I’ve seen evidence they were elsewhere at the time.
I just do be like that. I’m not going around doing things ‘because I’m a man’ but otherwise I don’t have an issue with me being a man.
When I was younger I had long hair and usually 2 or 3 days of growing beard. It was good enough and low maintenance. I liked the efficiency of it.
I’m balding and got a dense beard. It’s good enough and low maintenance, I like the efficiency of it.
But I don’t move like a cis guy, I don’t sit like a cis guy. I like yoga and crystals. I like videogames and cooking. I fucking hate the gym, and don’t really like practicing sports. I’m happy to act generally gender fluid, but I have no attraction to guys, so I never felt the urge to experiment with it.
So. I’m a person, I keep tidy with low maintenance and that’s generally good enough to get the attention from the people I’m interested in. Low effort wins.
gym not needed to do casual 10-squats whenever you see the opportunity.
I already have like eleven boy clothes. I can hardly muster the necessary space for clean and used storage, washing, and drying, the logistical expertise, the time of day, week, or year, nor the necessary enthusiasm to acquire a girl clothe on top of that
If it was as easy and complete to change sex/gender as it is in The Culture novel series I might change at least once just to see, but as things are right now such changes would be too much work and the result might leave a lot to be desired if I don’t already have a “desire”/“instinct” (not sure about the right word to use) to do such a thing, specially with current technologies.
I guess the most honest answer is I was conditioned to act and look like a man and I’m mostly fine with that I guess, I don’t feel like acting or looking much different would be better for me.
I know the binary gender roles are made up bullshit and I roll my eyes when people around me say shit like “women are inherently this or men are inherently that” but I also don’t feel the need to really change my entire personality because of this realization except for like quitting the toxic masculinity bullshit I was conditioned to reproduce.
I think about what it would be like to be the opposite gender, but it’s not a very strong feeling. It’s just me wondering what life is like for the other side. I also think that it would be too much trouble to accomplish a gender change, so just that fact tells me that I’m not actually trans. I don’t even think of myself as male most of the time. I’m me before I’m part of a category that includes almost half of the world’s population.
