Even if you get good at that thing, the compliments won’t subdue the imposter syndrome.
Yep. It’s a nasty thing the brain does, it puts all foreign information through a filter made from convictions. If you’re convinced that you do not deliver enough and are not worthy of love, your brain will make the wildest explanations for when someone just proves the opposite to you instead of just taking that at face value. If that person then maybe gives up at some point or just has a bad day your brain will be all like “Ah! See! Told you!”
Good thing is, you can train yourself out of that by doing parallel, rational analysis and explaining the result to yourself. Repeatedly, often. That is fucking hard though and you will fall back to the old mode when under stress. Keep on it, get external help with that, if possible.
Anyone else slightly obsessed with being well known for something just so people ask your opinion on stuff? I just kinda want some people to care what books I like or what YouTube channels I watch.
The best advise I heard is you don’t have to prove anything to anyone. Do whatever you want to do which you enjoy, as long as you’re not hurting anyone in the process. Do something because you enjoy doing it and you’re not expecting validation.
I don’t suffer from this, but man do I feel like a red crying blob on the inside.
You are worth of love red triangle dude. We don’t always get what we are worth of though
Omg
It is too early in the morning to be able to deeply relate to shit like this.
I go to Lemmy to escape the depression and the depression has followed me here, marvelous
It’s like hide and seek! But less fun.
You should block this community. Depression posting is kinda what it’s for.
Wait until there’s a 2me4me_irl.
There is. It pops up sometimes for me. Sometimes funny and relatable, sometimes depressing and relatable, sometimes WTF… And relatable.
Just like real life, somehow
I would unsubscribe from me_irl then. I like the content, but that sort of a community always had somewhat depressing memes, whether it’s here or on Reddit.
and yet nobody gives a crap. I’m currently trying to do some art just for myself, but there’s still that annoying urge to show it to someone, hoping for a shred of validation.
show me :3
Things that are made are meant to be shared – we’re such social creatures and we want to help each other. It’s hard to remove yourself from the equation but I think more and more the artist is more akin to someone reading a letter more than a creator. Share the things they are supposed to be.
While commonly true, it isn’t universlly true. I like making ghi gs with no intent to ever share them because they are for me. Not practice things, but things that make me happy from going through the process and having a result.
I also make somethings that other people see.
It’s tough because posting art online and getting a lot of unsolicited (and often unconstructive) criticism can be very demoralizing to less seasoned artists. I often see “well you shouldn’t have posted it online if you didn’t want comments” and an idea that only “good” art deserves to be seen.
When I was a young teen, I saw a thread on Reddit asking people to post their poems, so I posted one I was reasonably proud of. Only response was someone telling me it sucked. Kinda broke something in me that day, I don’t think I’ve written a poem since.
I’m sorry that sucks – My first internet community was DeviantArt back 20 years ago where it was really positive. I think that kind of did the opposite to me.
Now a days though – almost everything I post on Reddit gets removed as spam – it’s like an impossible system controlled by that gallowboob CCP robot
Honestly I’d love an art community more focused on growing artists. I don’t have much constructive criticism to offer, but I love watching people grow as artists.
They’re out there. Just off the top of my head, there’s https://lemmy.world/c/drawing.
I think that’s the one I’ve posted some of my nice doodles to.
Hi there! Looks like you linked to a Lemmy community using a URL instead of its name, which doesn’t work well for people on different instances. Try fixing it like this: !drawing@lemmy.world
When I was a young teen, I saw a thread on Reddit
I’d never thought i would be reading a sentence like this. Now, this makes me feel really, really old.
Reddit is almost 20 years old. People can be born and become adults in that time.
Sure, but I’m getting older and experienced that “oh, the 80s were 20 years ago” feeling, when i read that. Just like grrgyle wrote, it doesn’t feel like so much time passed.
We know. It just doesn’t feel that long ago.
Don’t even get me started on digg
Show meeee :3
I can only draw stick people, you can’t do worse than me!
That’s why it’s good to find someone else who also wants to share their stuff.
Yeah, it may feel like work at first, but after a while you gain a kind of appreciation for each other’s stuff, and then genuine interest takes hold and you start to look forward to what your friend(s) are going to share.
This is precisely what my book club has turned into. We haven’t read a book in over a year lol
I kinda had someone like that for a little bit, it’s why I started doing some art stuff. too bad they just kinda vanished without a word after weeks of telling me how great of a friend I am.
Yeah that can happen. It’s real work on both sides to maintain a relationship like that, and in my experience it usually doesn’t work out forever. It’s still worth it for the while that it does work, though.
Probably best to move on and find a new such person.
What kind of stuff do you make?
it’s sucked because noone ever seem to be this interested in me, but whatever.
Tbh I’m a total newbie at art. I’ve been trying to draw and play the piano for many years but I usually just give up after a couple of weeks of trying, so I’m not good at neither.
I kinda got into Vrchat last year and ended up spending two and a half months making an avatar from scratch.
I’ve recently started a character drawing course on Udemy so I can make my own reference art for 3D modeling. It’s gonna take a while but I’m just trying to enjoy the process.
Oh nice! So you made like a 3D avatar? Closest I’ve come to that is getting really detailed with character creation in games, but I get how it’s fun to design a character.
I’m a lifelong doodler, but never seem to be able to stick to courses. I just kind of take little pieces from each as a bumble along.
RE interest yeah I’ll admit to not being very interested in anyone else’s progress other than my own, but it’s nice to get some “check ins” from time to time, like how a course is going or whatever.
Don’t get your hopes up. I’m good at several things. Still not worthy of love.
Basically what I was told when I said ‘there is someone for everyone is a bullshit platitude’.
oddly concrete
Imposter syndrome isn’t real, you made it up because you are crazy. Just like you made up gaslighting.
Well, you didn’t make up gaslighting. Someone else did and you just stole it.
Because you are crazy
who did you hurt?
My mom praised me up and down for being naturally smart. Whenever I made a serious effort on something, she found a reason to punish me.
In case you needed this today:
Awh… Such a cute song…