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I wish I had an answer for you, I’m in a somewhat similar situation though I’ve been on HRT longer, had an orchi, and am not a virgin. I mainly just try to ignore my genitals outside of sexual contexts. I have a high sex drive and I worry that a neo-vagina wouldn’t be able to handle all the activities I’m interested in. If I could have a vulva+vagina without dilating I’d jump at the chance. Its weird though, for most of my life I had huge “bottom” energy and there was no real complication in terms of my desires. Then I kinda “rediscovered” my sexuality a couple years ago and it turns out I really enjoy topping. I don’t have any specific advice other than to say life’s a weird journey that will sometimes take you places you didn’t expect. Good luck, hope you get to a place where you can be comfortable.
Eberron too please!